So, working in an office really blows. I mean, half the time I'm not even working and I still hate the Daily Planet. Actually it's probably more like a fifth of the time I spend there that I'm actually working. A majority of my day I spend: staring at Lois' butt, kicking Jimmy's ass at everything, pretending to type stories when I'm really tweeting, and telling Perry I'm going out to "cover a story" at a local bar/strip joint. Anyway, work sucks, as I've most definitely mention before, so like all you humans I waste a massive amount of time on this thing called the internet.
Exhibit S: The Internet Meme
Recently, and by recently I mean the last ten years, Jimmy has been obsessed with these viral videos and memes. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about... seriously you probably cant even read so I'm not even gonna tell you. Anyway, each week Jimmy comes in with a new group of stupid cat pictures or a video of a baby singing or some trash. Personally I like the videos where people get hit in the face, or fall down and get hit in the nuts. I also like porn, but that's neither here nor there.
Hahaha, nice use of Meatshield, Bruce
So sometimes these viral videos get so popular the idiots contained within their pixels get famous as fuck... like Booster Gold level fame (so not really that famous). Sometimes the people are already famous. I think there was a video of me cursing people out at a Planet Krypton restaurant (I own the franchise, you think I could get hammered there). So recently this tiger blooded toe-head Charlie Sheen has started spewing a lot of crazy talk and people are thinking he's the bees knees. FUCK. DAT. I'm going to warn you right now, I knew a guy once who drank tiger's blood AND made a drug named after himself, his name was LEX FUCKING LUTHOR! And now look at that bald mother fucker. Always trying to shoot the sun, or sell weapons to orphans... and other evil junk.
Fucking asshole... that's FOUR WHOLE TENS of cake!
However, you still have time to avoid this. Don't patronize the fool known as Sheen. In fact, if you could convince him to move to Gotham, that'd probably be best. Batsy LOOOOOOOVES crazy people :) Actually instead of supporting Crazy Sheen, make your own meme! HEY-OOOOO and be sure to email them to thesupermanspeaks@gmail.com
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